Friday, December 31, 2021

New Pebble, Real Me ⚡💀🌹 🐢☮️🦝☯️💜

It's time that I drop a new pebble into the ole pocket. And take that shit seriously this time.

Joy > Rage.

Love > Gods.

Humanity > All.


Kindness > Strength.

Curiosity > Indoctrination.

The Art of Peace > The Art of War.

Humanity is the greatest and only form of higher intelligence in the universe, as far as we know, and that universe is everything known to exist.

I don't know why I forget sometimes.

Time to vape, shower, breathe in air, turn it into goodness, and be peace.

Yes, folks. It's legal.

Nothing left to do 


but smile, smile, smile.

Thursday, December 30, 2021

Many Judaisms, One Me

As you can probably tell if you've read more than one or two things on here, I am Jewish. Many of my heroes are Jewish as well. Most of them were not religious, and I am not religious either. I love Kabbalah because it's trippy as shit and harmless as long as you don't take it too seriously. Traditional religion is not my bag and not likely to become so outside of things like classes. I'm Jewish by choice, meaning that I converted.


Atlas Shrugged

Ayn Rand, creator of The Collective, a cult, is one of the greatest and most bizarre voices for reason I have encountered. Everyone should wrestle with Rand. If you accept her philosophy or reject it outright, you have not tried hard enough.



Carl Sagan dedicated his life to science and education. His essays in a National Geo book when I was a kid lit a candle in the dark. His books have made me a better father.



When I converted to Judaism, I took the name Baruch in honor of Baruch Spinoza. His ideas gave us the modern world. He walked away from the only community and family he had in order to be true to himself.


The Thirteen Petalled Rose

A couple of years ago I discovered the works of Rabbi Adin Steinsaltz, of blessed memory. I plan to read a little Steinsaltz every day for the foreseeable future.

The Talk (1 of 2)

OK kids. Schools in session, let's go. Here's everything you need to know about drugs for now.

Never consume the follwing:

  • Addictive depressants like
    • Alcohol in all forms
    • Barbiturates
    • Benzos, which work on GABA receptors just like alcohol. Never take more than a dose or two in any given course of medicine, unless it is an absolute emergency
  • Addictive Euphorics like
    • Heroin
    • All Opioids, except when prescribed and then always stop before completing the course
  • Addictive stimulants like
  • Designer Drugs like
    • THCO Acetate.
      • From High Times: Between 1949 and 1975, the U.S. Army Chemical Crops conducted human experiments at the Edgewood Arsenal facility in Maryland. THC acetate ester was used on dogs to test the substance’s potential as a non-lethal incapacitating agent. Researchers found that it had twice the ability to throw off dog’s muscle coordination when compared to delta-9 THC.
      • This shit is horrific. On multiple occasions I awoke from a nightmare to find that I was acting it out in real life. A fairly small oral dose of THCO Acetate caused me to fall asleep and wake up in the shower 3 hours later, in the middle of the night, yelling about a dear friend --who is a woman--secretly being Lex Luthor. Yes, really.

Friday, December 24, 2021

The Solace of Fortitude

Life moves at a flash. It is easy to blink and miss something coming or going. I wrote this essay on 12/9, a day when I had steroid shots in my neck due to spine issues and neuropathy.

The details of how my neck got jacked up are unimportant, but this was not due to something I missed. It was due to me lifting too many weights past age 40 and asking my children to punch me in the stomach despite knowing what that did to Houdini years ago. I am no man of steel.

That's okay. I used to think life was about being happy, and I dreamed of being Luke Skywalker or Clark Kent. I have learned that it is about becoming healthier over time, being kind, and exchanging gratitude with others. It has taken me over 47 years to get very far down this path.

That's okay. It is easy to become so self-involved that we miss the sort of blinkworthy magical events that might form precious memories if given the opportunity.

That's okay. More memories will come. All we can do is try our best. Yoda gets this one wrong. Yoda gets a lot wrong.

That's okay. More wisdom will come. If you are receptive, lessons find you through teachers and loved ones and songs and books and dreams. Just pay attention as best you can. Try to observe without passing judgment or making guesses. If you can.

Once you can be at peace with all of those things, remember to breathe into your belly instead of your chest, and start walking. A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. If not you, who? If not now, when? Embarrassment is not a terminal illness.

Years of hardship and struggle have provided me with the gift of peace. I would not wish them on anyone. Over time I learned to lean into them, getting a bit stronger bit by bit. As my old friend Ryan Franklin taught me to say, "Crawl, walk, run." I've modified it a bit: "Crawl, walk, run, fly." That's what we all want, right?

When you have been to Helheim and back, with no permanent injuries other than a few scars and fillings and tattoos, you can call yourself fortunate. I am very fortunate.

Life is a gift. With time, most harm from incidents and accidents fade, if we work and allow healing to occur. Atlas was cursed to hold up the heavens as a form of punishment after the Gods vanquished the Titans. He is welcome to shrug all he wants. The heavens hold up themselves. No one has told him yet. It is kind of funny to watch him struggle, although admittedly not very nice.

I think I will go listen to some Remy Zero. Sunshine feels good. It is a good day to be alive. Every day is.


Sunday, December 12, 2021

Navigating Worlds

Yesterday I received my order of Navigating Worlds: Collected Essays (2006-2020) by Bezalel Naor. It looks very interesting and appears to have a lot of information about Sabbateanism, an unfortunate development in the 17th century that centered around a man named Shabbatai T'zvi who converted to Islam after many people thought he was a supernatural messiah.

Messiah (Mashiach) means anointed one, not demigod or anything like that. The Messianic Age is a concept that envisions world peace. Something good to hope for.

I've only read a single essay, entitled When Elijah's Mantle Fell. It is about the songwriter Leonard Cohen, who has been a dark light to me for decades. He is on the short list with Robert Zimmerman, Phililp Larkin, and Michael Render.

A Day That Will Live In Infamy!

Forty years ago, HBO was a relatively new service. They only had a handful of movies that they played over and over again. On 12/12/1981 they must have played the Steven Spileberg masterpiece 1941 a thousand times.

Mani & Papa were watching us all day, and they allowed it. Papa was not big on ratings. He took me to Rambo in grade school, a decision of which I approve. He also let us ride around downtown Atlanta in the back of his pickup truck, a decision of which I do not approve. I wrapped that truck around a tree at age 12 or so with Papa riding shotgun. His head hit the windshield, but fortunately he did not fly through it.

I remember 12/12/1981 so well because that's the day my youngest brother was born. I don't know the story behind his name, but I know he is special.

I love you, Paul. Happy birthday. I am so proud to be your big brother.

Tuesday, December 7, 2021

How 2BA King



Monday, December 6, 2021

Yankee and the Brave

As far back as grade school, I’ve thought it would be entertaining to be a journalist of some sort. It’s just an adventure to imagine now, like Indiana Jones or Star Wars.

My favorite movie of all time is Rocky. He is a sweet, gentle, misunderstood soul who saves a cat and tries to convince a tough kid to make better decisions. He is just trying to lead the best life he can doing what he loves with the skills he has. He doesn't want to beat a creed or become the greatest anything in the world. He just wants to go the distance. He's a survivor.

The big difference is, I am a man of ideas and words, not weapons and fists. Numbers improve the machines that make weapons. Numbers fuel computers. Words make thoughts. They will always be stronger than the sword, the gun, or any weapons conceived by anyone on this world or any other.

One of the fun things about life in the 21st century is the ability for every individual to share their ideas and experiences: We are all reporters thanks to YouTube. It’s just a matter of poise, polish, and professionalism. Maybe I can live the dream!

Sunday, December 5, 2021

Thank You, Section 119

I love the website Section 119. It's where I bought all of the ties I wear at work, including this iconic Bowie tie. One of the things I love about Bowie is how he has evolved and transformed over the years. You can never tell what he is going to pull next.

Anyway, I used Section 119 and Planet of the Vapes (Yes, it's legal) to learn how an emerging service called Buy Now Pay Later works. I think it is dangerous, you guys. It will wreck your budget for months. Plus I suspect that the BNPL industry is full of money launderers. Do not let your money pass through their networks. That's how crime is funded. If you think white collar criminals* are nice, normal people, watch Ozark. That's who we are talking about.

*I am not talking about myself in some wink wink way. Obviously.

Thursday, December 2, 2021

Breathe Twice, Write Once ☮️

I've had a very tiring couple of weeks. Thanks to everyone who has been patient with me as I have tried to process too much information. I am easily overwhelmed sometimes. Thank you.
Be peace.


More commonly known as Matisyahu 

🌞🌝🌚 🌞

Reach for the sky
Keep your eye on the prize
Forever in my mind
You're my golden sunshine
If it's rainin' in your mind
So push those clouds aside
Forever by my side
You're my golden sunshine

Thanks, Spotify!

2021 in review. My wild and crazy life. Sounds pretty damn accurate. Thanks, Spotify! 🙂☮️

May Past Become Prelude


I Love Rhythmic American Poetry

Michael Render is my favorite living poet other than Bob Dylan. El-P is dope too.

I am enjoying an even more fun version of a favorite single from last year. I am glad I took the day off to relax and think.

Making time to think ☮️

I read that Alan Greenspan used to start every day in the bathtub reading through a stack of newspapers. True or not, it's a cool story. It reminds me that every once in a while, we need to slow down, listen to some good tunes, be peace, and think about purpose.

Wednesday, December 1, 2021

Who is John Galt?

Hey kids, do the right thing whenever you can. Do the next best when you cannot. Walk tall. Be kind. Be yourself. Be good.

Read everything that interests you. Keep the good parts like William Goldman did for S Morgenstern.

Work On the Spectrum

Being autistic in a neurotypical world is not the easiest thing. If you are fortunate like I am, then you have a job that pays well, provides stable benefits, and helps to ensure your survival. In all likelihood, you are less fortunate than I am though. I'm one of the lucky ones. Many Autists aren't as fortunate as I am.

I recently remembered how hard being an Autist can be. It can be very hard. Short version of the story goes like this: I'm handed a project with many many many zeroes attached to it in September, with an impossible six-week implementation timeframe. I got a promotion a week or two before this happened, which increased my job responsibilities.

If I were neurotypical, it might be possible to push through. But when you have ADHD or Autism or extreme sensitivity whatever the heck is different about me, it is impossible.

Dig if you will the picture: An autistic man who has expressed a strong dislike of being on camera is forcibly seated outside the office of a high-ranking exec, and he is always on camera. Boom, boom, boom. One new thing after another hits. Greg, can you send me this? (No.) Greg can you send me that? (No.) Each question is a potential bear trap that could ruin my career and land me in jail if I get it wrong.

Made it through the impossible day, read an industry report today that bothers the heck out of me. Good thing Hemp Hop delivers CBN, which is the safest and best way to get a good night's sleep other than high doses of magnesium. I support medication in all forms as long as research supports it and it is legal.

Eight is the number of infinity

On Sunday night, I was blessed to attend a community Chanukah celebration. That night I was recognized as a Jew worldwide. A song by Matisyahu was playing when I sat down. I listened to a song by him on the way to work every day in the second half of 2018, immediately after returning to Judaism. I converted, got cold feet, left, and returned. Life can get complicated. We do our best.

As I settled into my seat, a song started playing. I knew all the words. As the last piece of a puzzle fell into place, I remembered who I am and started singing along.

I fell asleep as soon as I got home. When I awoke, I realized the importance of what had happened. I’ve had a couple of tough days since then. But my strength comes not from men at all.

Give it a listen. Walk talk. Be kind. Be yourself. Be good. I am grateful for everything in my life right now.